Hey, mirror, mirror, there on the wall, who has the prettiest cunt of all? If you don’t answer that it’s mine, while my thighs are spread before you and my pink lips are glimmering in your eye, I’ll just have to try harder. Make you look, harder. I like it when it’s just us. When I’m kneeling in front of you, my knees hard against the […]
Audio Porn / Erotica / Masturbation
Please, can I wank about you?
Listen as audio Please, can I wank about you? Over you? To you? Thinking of you, and us together, and you alone? Remembering all the dirty, delicious things you’ve done to me and imagining all the sex that’s to come? Looking at all the photos and videos and messages you’ve sent to me, knowing full well what they’d make me do? Please, can I wank […]
Erotica / Masturbation / Sexual Encounters
PinkLabel and Chill; Watching Porn Together
It’s Friday night and everything on Netflix is shit. After a long week, we’d designated tonight as movie night: no phones, no lights, tinned cocktails, that popcorn that’s so sugary it sticks your teeth together; just us, propped up in bed next to each other, lit only by the glow of 50 inches of cheap set design and over-acting. Except, we’ve been browsing for 20 […]
Masturbation / Romance / Sexual Encounters
Beaching Off; a seaside wank
One of the reasons I adore this beach is because of how quiet it becomes at dusk. The fair-weather sun-worshippers pack up their inflatables and mini tents and fractious children and slip away for chips somewhere else. The few lifeguards pack up and clock off. The boat trippers turn off their cheery soundtrack, to the landscape’s relief. Paddle boards are deflated and kayaks are lifted […]
Masturbation
Planning My First Orgasm of 2023
Yes, yes, New Years is a somewhat benign and meaningless measure of time passing slowly as we all contemplate our shortcomings and regrets and weight while the Earth literally burns around us and we all trudge towards an inevitable death brought about by age, avoidable disease, or poverty. But, but, I feel my first orgasm of the new year needs to be a little special. […]