Do Bodies Count?

I don’t know how many people I’ve had sex with. I don’t know how many have penetrated me, how many have brought me to orgasm, how many dicks I’ve sucked. I’m not sure how many genitals I’ve seen in real life or how many have seen mine. How many flies have I zipped open with an urgent hunger? 

I didn’t realise I was meant to keep a tally. 

Whose benefit would a total count be for, exactly? What would I personally gain from knowing how many cocks have been in my mouth? Perhaps it would have a use as a detail for my memoirs when life is on the wane, or maybe an excellent title for it: “206 Dicks and Counting: A Slut’s Life”. 

I guess it could be looked upon as a method of self-definition, although I find I can adequately define how much of a whore I am without it. Is it intended to complement an excruciating self-assessment process where I look back upon the total for the past year and either berate or cheer myself, then use it to form the basis of my next annual target-setting? 

I wouldn’t be surprised if some mundane guy with that haircut in some mundane club used it as part of a pick up: “Hey there beautiful, fancy being my number 37?”. 

Sure, I could put it on my Tinder profile, but as a brag or a warning? Are we all meant to know what the magic number is, the point at which good experience becomes nasty? Sure they’d fuck me if they were my 19th but certainly not my 20th, don’t be such a slag. I don’t recall that detail in the handbook; I guess I’d have to rely on a cis man, or religious fanatic, or prudish conservative telling me. I personally know guys who would break down a door for the opportunity to be the 20th dick to enter me in a single night, you’re all missing out. 

We all know the real answer of course; as a femme, I’m meant to be ashamed of it and shamed by it. It’s meant to be used as a way to subjugate me. It’s meant to give you some kind of superiority over me. It’s meant to support the idea that you know what’s best for me and my body.  

In which case, it’s lucky you don’t know the number and I can continue fucking completely fucking shame-free, isn’t it babe? 

A photo of my naked body lying on my stomach on a bed, with a view of my back and bum. One of my feet is kicked up in the air.

7 thoughts on “Do Bodies Count?

  1. Great post.

    There is no shame in that which we give freely, wantingly, lovingly…or that we receive from those with mutual desires. Our bodies and minds are gifts we share. There is only shame, pity, for those that mistreat these shared moments – some moments which reflect a deep passion and other moments that simply sate an itch. But all are gifts nonetheless.

  2. Thank you for highlighting the double-standard that exists in society. Men are largely rewarded for being a ‘player’, it’s a badge of honour to fellas to have multiple conquests, yet women are treated entirely differently, and that isn’t fair.

  3. I don’t think it matters how many you or anyone has had. What matters is you enjoyed yourself, you’re on a journey to explore yourself and be surprised by what you discover on your journey. Reading your experiences or fantasy thoughts is a massive turn on for me. I do love your beautiful body too so visually, intellectually and audibly you’re incredible. So keep enjoying yourself and don’t feel anyone need you to justify however many, or little it has been.

      1. It would be to offer a counterpoint to someone claiming the body count should be zero. I dare say they’re a fairly strict, very conservative type.

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