There’s a film which some people (me) like to watch at Christmas called The Holiday. It’s a terrible film, which includes a character who is both unable to cry and has been gaslighted by her ex into believing she’s bad at sex. It includes an exchange about foreplay being overrated; it’s trash. But, it’s festive trash. Anyway, the opening scene of the film involves Kate […]
Romance
Notes On Intimacy
One day, several years ago, we had sex for the last time. We didn’t know at the time it was going to be the last: it may seem that a quickie on the sofa was an unworthy ending, but actually, that’s very us. They had walked into the room while I was lying on my stomach on the sofa, typing or reading something I can’t […]
Dating / Polyamory
Swiping Right: Who I Date
The continual swipe left is giving me RSI. One after the other, faces rush past, faces that don’t seize or intrigue or attract me. They appear like ghosts; fleeting and morbid. The ghosts of future bad choices, of heartbreak, of misplaced humour, and of inevitable ghosting. Each and every one makes me feel a mixture of guilt and self-disgust, with a sprinkle of hope that […]
Dating / Polyamory
My Polyamory Isn’t Weird
Recently at a party (a party where I wasn’t present, perhaps crucially) one friend told another how weird they find my relationship. Specifically weird was how I’m friends with my partner’s girlfriend*. Even more specific still, the friend found it weird how we sat next to each other, chatting and laughing, at a recent gathering for my partner’s birthday. They found it weird that we […]
Audio Porn / Kinks / Sexual Encounters
My First Sex Party
Listen as audio “Are you here all by yourself? Well, you soon won’t be” My first erotic story, written when I was 19 or 20, was about a woman who goes to a sex party for the first time, by herself, to live her greatest fantasies. And here I am, going to a sex party for the first time, by myself, to live my own. […]